Randi Kreiss

Embracing friends who embrace the Donald

Posted

I love you anyway.

You don’t care? Well maybe some of you don’t, but I believe most of you do. I know the word “anyway” implies a qualifier, and the truth is this: I do love you, with a footnote. I love you despite the fact that I am completely mystified by your decision to support a presidential candidate whom I see as bigoted, unstable, morally bankrupt and unprepared for any demands of the presidency.

I know you find fault with Hillary Clinton, but looking at the two candidates, who should hold the nuclear codes, support equal rights for our citizens and manage the complex affairs of government?

Aren’t we seeing and hearing the same effluvium flowing from Mr. Trump? Are we all reading the same respected economists, studying the same battle-tested military leaders, listening to the top scientists and revered political leaders who declare that a Trump presidency would be a disaster? How can you believe the promises of “change” and “prosperity” and “toughness” without hearing any substantive plans or supporting details?

You’re smart, and you read the same analyses I do that detail the lies Trump tells over and over again. Along with me and the rest of the sane world, you deplored his disrespect of the Khan family, who lost their son in Iraq; you winced when his campaign posted anti-Semitic graphics of Clinton and racist remarks about Mexican-Americans. But you shook it off and walked into the light. That is, the hypnotic light blasting from the TV, 24/7, hyping the “unconventional,” “bold” and “different” Trump.

It’s as if we, who have history and common values and similar education and shared hopes for our children, are suddenly strangers. We look at what I know to be a buffoon in a man suit, and you’re telling me it’s a world leader.

Because you’re my friend, the dilemma is acute. Before the Donald burst onto the scene, I knew you to be conservative in your politics, Republican in the voting booth and holding views on foreign policy, the economy, social services and human rights that were different from my own, but it never mattered very much. Our dinners were more interesting because of our debates.

Over the years, you drifted right and I drifted left. But it’s all been OK, right? You voted for Bush; I voted for Obama. I think Obama has been a good president, a beacon of decency and intelligence. His family life is inspiring in an age of divorce and easy in/easy out relationships.

You are in another place, where you see the president as the cause of escalating terrorism, the weak link in global politics and a secret Muslim who has allowed his faith to inform America’s foreign policy. You read the same statistics I do, that the economy is on the upswing, more people have work and the rising tide has particularly helped the poorest among us. You read the same stats, but you see them through a different prism.

Your visceral dislike of Hillary Clinton is part of the prism. But I am confounded by your intention to push the lever for a strikingly dysfunctional and inappropriate candidate for the presidency. You like to think things through. What happens after the big shocker of a Trump win? What happens next? What will he do if North Korea sends a missile our way, or there is another financial collapse, or if Zika mosquitoes suddenly metastasize into helicopter-size killing machines? What experience in domestic policy or world affairs can he bring to the table?

What nuance and skill can he bring to international diplomacy? How can he thread the needle of delicate global negotiations when he is so ham-handed and narcissistic in his worldview?

After the gut-satisfying gotcha that you may enjoy after a Trump win, how will you feel when his blunders and insensitivity cost us international support and increased racial strife here at home?

Most of us have children. We know how we would feel if a daughter of ours was the target of Trump’s fat-shaming or sexism. Who is he to evaluate women based on what they eat and how they look?

I am stuck in this place of not being able to believe that you, my friend, actually believe Donald Trump would do better at leading our nation than a former first lady, a former senator, a former secretary of state.

How do we negotiate this profound political divide between us and find our friendship intact at the end of the election?

I suppose we remember why we became friends in the first place and hold on to that.

Copyright © 2016 Randi Kreiss. Randi can be reached at randik3@aol.com.