Randi Kreiss

On the road: Slovenia to the White House

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Safe to say that young Melanija Knaves never dreamed that she would become first lady of the United States. That makes 64 million of us who never seriously considered the possibility. But here we are, post-inauguration, and Melanija Knaves, now Melania Trump, is indeed the first lady.

On one hand, I want to say, “Well, here’s the American dream come to life: a poor girl born in a communist state works hard, emigrates to America, marries the love of her life and finds herself at the top of the world.” On the other hand, I want to say, “How did a nude model who lied about having a college degree, plagiarized a sitting first lady’s speech and describes her passions as Pilates and reading magazines ever land in the White House? If I had a third hand, I’d say, “The election is over. And my hope is that Melania will turn out to be the real wild card: a decent person who will grow with the job and reach out to all Americans.

Nothing stranger or more unlikely could have happened than the rise of Donald Trump to the presidency. So why is it impossible for Melania to become a force for reason, kindness, inclusiveness and sensitivity? Unlikely, I agree, but possible.

She is, after all, an immigrant. She has some knowledge of what it feels like to seek the advantages of life in America, even though she didn’t wade across the Rio Grande.

She is, after all, a mother who apparently takes her job seriously. Her hubby will be no help there; speaking to Howard Stern, he once said about his children, “I mean, I won’t do anything to take care of them.” Right.

Melania speaks six languages, and could be an asset in world affairs if she were so inclined, and if her husband were smart enough to respect her abilities.

That is also unlikely, since, according to a story in Vanity Fair, Mr. Trump has publicly referred to her as “my supermodel,” boasted about their “incredible sex” and bragged that she has “no cellulite.” Well, maybe she doesn’t, but she does have a brain and her own thoughts and her own personality, even though they’ve been shielded from public view.

I have no problem with her rise to fame through modeling, even nude. I’m fine with her famous pregnant pose in a gold bikini, shot by Annie Leibovitz. It’s cool that she used her attributes to get ahead in the world. Women have often made their way using their beauty and style. Women, especially in cultures that do not help young girls become educated and prepared for high-level professions, have had to use their looks to succeed.

Melania chose to marry Trump, who is 24 years older than she is, and she chose to be his third wife and sign the requisite pre-nup and live life in the gilded world of the Trump family. It’s an old story with a twist. Usually the young bride doesn’t wind up in the White House.

Hers was a soft landing into luxury from very humble beginnings. For her formative years she lived in an apartment in communist block housing in Sevnica, Slovenia. She started modeling when she was 5, and when she was 18, according to published stories, she began traveling to Paris and Milan for photo shoots. She got an American visa and became a citizen in 2006, two years after Trump proposed to her.

She made her bed, but perhaps she can ruffle it up a bit. Perhaps she can find her voice, and speak for substantive issues. She can wear her 25-carat diamond ring and her designer clothes and she can also become her own person, rather than arm candy that her husband trots around.

On Inauguration Day, the media were chatting about the new first lady’s powder blue cashmere ensemble by Ralph Lauren. Much was made of connections to former first ladies Melania has said she admires, like Jacqueline Kennedy, who also wore Ralph Lauren.

As we have learned since Jackie’s death, she was pretty unhappy in the White House, humiliated by her husband’s philandering, stifled by the rules of engagement as first lady and constrained by the demands and expectations of a larger-than-life political clan. No wonder Melania identifies with her.

My hope is that the new first lady will feel empowered to speak for those whose voices have been drowned out by the Trump megaphone. Jackie Kennedy had to play by the rules of 1960 America; perhaps Michelle Obama is a more liberating role model.

Maybe there’s nothing much going on aside from the Ralph Lauren dresses and stiletto heels. Maybe Melania didn’t cringe inside when her husband talked about grabbing other women’s genitals, but maybe she did, and maybe a bolder Melania will emerge in the coming months. She can find her voice, and she can do good. She can become a woman that the little girl in Slovenia never could have imagined, even in her dreams.

Copyright © 2017 Randi Kreiss. Randi can be reached at randik3@aol.com.