55.0°,
Mostly Cloudy Heart-stopping event reaps secondary rewards
I hate being an opening act, but in the medical adventures of my family, I cop to being the second banana. The first banana, no disrespect intended, is my husband.
I also hate to say I told you so, but I did. Several columns ago, I mentioned that during my own (now minor and insignificant) surgery five weeks ago, I noticed that my hubby looked dreadful.
An angiogram later, it turns out the guy has been running on fumes. Three major arteries blocked with the best numbers he ever saw on a test: 100 percent, 100 percent and 95 percent. In cardiac terms, not good at all.
On May 17, the surgeons at St. Francis Hospital in Manhasset did a triple bypass, which, for the uninitiated, involves removing veins from the leg, relocating an artery from the chest and using the new vessels to bypass the blocked ones.
Once again, the kids, who live out of town and are beginning to be suspicious of our recent medical emergencies, flew to our side. Unfortunately, my son decided to watch a bypass on YouTube. He forgot that he went to law school, not medical school. His natural color didn’t return for days.
My daughter, who did go to medical school, forgot that I might not like to hear all the horrific possibilities that might lie ahead, the best being psychosis or sudden death.
The operation went fine. And, also, the patient survived. One day in the CCU, one day in a step-down unit, three days in a regular room and then home.
On Day One post-op, my husband whispered to me that he was “having starfish.” My daughter, the psychiatrist, took notice.
On Day Two, he said there had been parakeets flying around his room the night before. Hmmm. Daughter raised eyebrow.
On Day Three the parakeets went to roost and my husband was back in real time, watching CNN and communing in a meaningful way with Wolf Blitzer.
By Day Four he was doing laps around the floor in his bright red pajama bottoms. “You must be Mr. Kreiss,” the nurses called. This guy, who got into this trouble by never missing an opportunity to overdo things, had lapped the nurses’ station 17 times.
