True friends are worth waiting for

Having spent his entire life in the northeast, my good friend is packing his bags and heading west in search of work, a new life and adventure. He is such a good, sincere friend to my entire family and I am sorry to see him go, but I wish him better than the best.

His leaving is particularly difficult because the chance to meet and forge a friendship like ours -- especially after childhood years have passed – isn’t easy. He was one of the exceptions; a great friend I met as an adults.

I suspect that friendships begin and last when people simply “get” (appreciate and accept) each other. There have been times when we can test our buddies’ patience and limits -- and they ours -- but the alliances and companionships matter so much that we call on survival skills and make the relationship last.

All told, the people who seem to supply and support friendships the most are the men and women who know themselves. They make no attempt to impress (or, as we say at home, try too hard). They come from all areas of our lives and have common values. They speak from the heart and act with it as well. They do what they do for their work, home and family – and do it quite well in fact – and they aren’t compelled to promote it.

In my world, it was a kindergartener circa 1965 who picked up the conversation where the last email left off, the true blue pal who helped me through the horrors of high school in the late ‘70s, the roommate who gave me all the tools to make it to adulthood during those dreaded disco years and the comrades who provide a sanity check when parenthood roasted my good judgment. To you, I say thanks. I only hope that I have given you the kind of care you have given me.

And as for the mistakes, having fallen for adults who are still stuck in a high school time warp or compromised on some standards just to fit in, let’s be a little smarter and look a little deeper next time.

Friends help us live and love longer, and the quest is worth it.

Lauren Lev is an East Meadow resident and a direct marketing/advertising executive working on Long Island. She teaches advertising and marketing communications courses at the Fashion Institute of Technology/SUNY and LIU Post. Her story on a Jewish education program impacting our local community will appear in “Thin Threads: Real Stories of Hadassah Life Changing Moments” in late spring 2012.