Beautiful Me comes to Seaford

A self-esteem program for girls, born out of tragedy, is making its way to Seaford. Beautiful Me, presented by the Hance Family Foundation, will be coming to Seaford Harbor and Manor elementary schools this year.

The foundation started after the 2009 deaths of the three Hance daughters, Emma, 8, Alyson, 7, and Katie, 5, who were killed in a crash upstate. The uniqueness of each girl inspired parents Jackie and Warren, who have since welcomed a new daughter, Casey, to start the Beautiful Me program.

On Oct. 1, teachers at the Manor School were trained in the program, and Harbor teachers followed on Oct. 8. Introducing the program to Seaford was Assistant Principal Caroline SchozerShe was working in the Floral Park School District, where the three girls were students, at the time they died. The phone call in which she found out about the tragedy is one she says she remembers every day.

Schozer noted that the family has taken a tragedy and turned it into something positive for thousands of girls. Beautiful Me seminars have been held in dozens of school districts and on college campuses, and can be adapted for girls of all ages. The basic program is three one-hour sessions. School districts can choose to expand it.

In Seaford, Schozer said the plan is to host the program for girls in third and fifth grades. Third-graders, she said, are just coming into their own, and fifth-graders are preparing to head to middle school. Having girls repeat the program multiple times during the course of their school careers is beneficial, she added, noting that there are also plans to have it in the seventh grade at Seaford Middle School.

Leading the training were consultants Peggy Schlechter and Karen Finn. They talked about the different activities that would take place in the workshops, and the resources that the foundation provides. Each session starts with a video, and there would be teacher-led discussions. Schlechter said that groups should be kept to no more than 12 girls, so everyone has a chance to share their thoughts and feelings in a session. “We want the girls to feel safe and comfortable,” she said.

One activity would have the girls tracing their hands, and writing on it what they feel is “beautiful” about them. For another exercise, the girls choose from a list of adjectives six words that describe them — three positive and three honest, the latter not necessarily a good personality trait.

Social worker Sharon Klein will be leading the Beautiful Me program at the Harbor School, and said the activity she likes most is where the girls share compliments with each other.

“I love how this program really focuses on the things that make you unique and make you special,” she said. “I think it will be good, honestly, for the whole school.”

Klein said that girls often feel pressure to look a certain way, and Beautiful Me encourages them to lead healthy lifestyles but also be proud of who they are. She added that there are several girls she feels can benefit from the program, and hopes it helps some of the more shy students come out of their shells.

The program also focuses on respect and problem solving. When the girls complete the three sessions, they receive a gift from the foundation — a necklace with three hearts and a picture of the Hance daughters with a message.

Teachers who are interested in facilitating discussions will have another round of training. Schozer said there are many who want to work with Beautiful Me in Seaford.

Klein said that teachers who take part in the program will discuss how to make it meaningful for Seaford students. “We don’t want to do it just for the sake of doing it,” she said. “We need to figure out how we’re going to make this effective for our school.”