By Linda Sepadin
Here are a few:Accept that you can't have it all. Decisions force us to close the door on other possibilities - paths not taken, careers not chosen, experiences you didn't have. Would your marriage to your old love have worked out better? Fantasize all you like, but you'll never really know. So, visit the "what if" scenario if you must, but do not invite it to reside in your home - not even for an overnight visit. Let the past be. Live in the present where the quality of your decisions will make a difference. Some decisions don't work out as expected; this does not necessarily make it a bad decision. If you decide to take a vacation in Florida in February and the weather is rainy,
c'est la vie. This is not a bad decision, just one that didn't work out well. However, if you choose to spend your vacation in the Cayman Islands in the midst of the hurricane season, this is a bad decision, analogous to an unforced error. Seek out the information you need in order to make a good decision.More thinking is not always better thinking. Think. But if you tend to overdo the researching, ruminating and information seeking, get smarter by thinking less. All analysis reach a point of diminishing returns. Good decisions can take place relatively quickly, based as much on thoughtful intuition as on meticulous assessment of endless data.Don't defer decisions endlessly. Sure there is a time to put off making a decision. Perhaps, you need more information. Or wish to consult with your accountant first. Or wait for a less anxious time. Just don't wait so long that the decision is made for you by someone else. And don't react impulsively ("
what the hell!") simply because you can no longer stand being indecisive.Trust your intuition. Intuition is knowledge that's gained without the direct use of rational processes. It's an impression, a perception, an insight whose origins you may not fully understand. It's an important source of information and should not be ignored. But don't confuse intuition with impulsiveness. The latter invariably leads to the worst decisions.Improving your decision making is your best bet for improving the quality of your life. Take a first step today by putting into practice one or more of the above ideas. Once you start the process, decision making will seem a lot clearer and easier than it does when you do not have a blueprint for success.
Linda Sapadin, Ph.D., is a psychologist in private practice who specializes in helping individuals, families and couples overcome self-defeating patterns of behavior. She is the author of Master Your Fears: How to Triumph Over Your Worries and Get On With Your Life (John Wiley, 2004.) Copyright © 2005
