By: Linda Sapadin
In our busy world, despite the fact that many of us measure our value by how busy we are or how much we accomplish, we still have that need to set aside a day to slow down and give thanks. Last week, most of us had the occasion to be with people who are important to us. We took the time to reflect on family, friends, freedom and many other good things that we value. This week, I'd like to suggest expanding on what you're thankful for by taking the time to cherish the many things you now know that make your life easier and more satisfying. To give you some examples, here are a few of my personal favorites. 1. When the day is over, let it be done. Begin the next day with a fresh start. 2. If you think well of people, they usually live up to your expectations. The reverse of this statement is also true. 3. Just because you think you are right, doesn't mean you are or that other people will think you are. 4. Kids really appreciate it when you appreciate them for who they are now, not for what they could be - when they "reach their potential" or if they "do their best." 5. When you work hard, are persistent and still can't change something (or someone), it's a sure sign that it's time for you to change your own attitude about it. 6. Sometimes, it is easier to ask for forgiveness than it is to ask for permission. 7. When you're frustrated with a question that yields no answer, try changing the question. 8. If you expend more energy trying to solve someone else's problem than he or she is, stop! It's a waste of time and energy that you will eventually regret. 9. Facing what you need to face is preferable, in the long run, to avoiding it, running away from it or denying it. 10. Be generous with your time and energy when it comes to things and people you really care about. It's amazing how enjoyable life can be when you develop an attitude of appreciating what you have and know rather than focusing on what you don't have and don't know. Feeling happy is not so much determined by great things happening to you but because you define and experience what's happening in your life as good.
Linda Sapadin, Ph.D, is a psychologist in private practice who works with individuals, families and couples. Copyright © 2003.
