By: Linda Sapadin
It's too much for me to cope with. I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop. How am I supposed to deal with all these terrible things without going crazy?"Kelly's not the only one who is wondering how to keep her cool during trying times as well as be appropriately cautious without going berserk.Here are a few suggestions about how to handle fear, stress and anxiety:1. It's good to be aware of world events but a constant dosage of "gloom and doom" news can be damaging to your psyche. Hence, limit your exposure to the news. An overdose of bad news is guaranteed to get you keyed up, tense, uptight, feeling helpless, overwhelmed and confused. The cure: turn off the TV, click off the home page of your internet provider, and toss the newspaper into the garbage as soon as you've finished perusing it.2. "Gloom and doom" friends can leave you feeling just as jittery as the news. After a brief interaction, change the topic to something more upbeat. This is not denial; it is creating a balance in your life. No matter what's happening in the larger world, it's still important for you to go about your everyday business without being debilitated by fear, stress and anxiety.3. Some happenings, like a blizzard, can feel like just one more difficult event to handle. But beware of putting a negative spin on everything. Remember when snow used to be fun? Remember when you wished for a day in which you could just hang around at home and not do anything? Yes, I know, you still had to shovel your way out, but isn't it nice from time to time to do back-breaking work instead of brain-draining or rushing around work? 4. Do what you can do to make things safer for yourself without driving yourself crazy. If buying duct tape, plastic and water makes you feel more protected, that's fine. But if you went to the store and all you found were empty shelves, don't panic. You are not doomed. Chances are duct tape will be just as effective as "duck and cover" air raid drills were in the 50's and 60's. 5. Watch your language! No, I'm not talking about curse words. I'm talking about scare words. If you've been terrorizing yourself by saying such things as, "Oh my God, war with Iraq will be World War III" or "I'm frightened out of my wits about a terrorist attack" or "I'm going to crack up if one more awful thing happens," STOP! You become your own worst enemy when you make everything into a catastrophe. You don't need to take your fear to the nth degree with such language. You can be afraid without being scared to death. Rising hysteria is contagious. Do not contribute to it. When it's an anxious day for you, calm yourself down by taking three deep breaths, by saying something nice to someone you love and by treating yourself to an enjoyable or relaxing activity.
Linda Sapadin, Ph.D. is a psychologist in private practice who works with individuals, families and couples. © Copyright 2003
