By Nick Buglione
No, it wasn't the grandiose wedding and reception that Monica, 28, had dreamed of as a child, but that didn't really matter. She and Fred, 36, were in love and very much looking forward to a long life together with their infant daughter, Katrina, and 8-year-old son, Danny.
Yet just weeks after their wedding, Fred was gone -- shipped out to Kuwait along with the rest of the Fort Totten-based Army Reserve 773rd Transportation Company.
"The day before Thanksgiving was the day that he was actually on a plane to Kuwait, but he left [East Meadow] Nov. 2," said Monica, noting that Fred first spent time training in Fort Dix, N.J., before heading overseas. "He's been in the military for 18 years," Monica said. "He started out after high school and went straight into boot camp. He comes from a military family."
Having joined the Army in 1984, Dana enlisted in the Army Reserves shortly after his 1992 discharge. A lifelong East Meadow resident, he works as a diesel truck mechanic and lives with his family in the same Lenox Avenue house he grew up in.
Now a sergeant first class with the 773rd, Dana and his fellow reservists are responsible for "transporting logistical supplies, fuel and food" to U.S. troops now fighting in Iraq, a company spokesman said.
Although watching Fred leave home wasn't easy for his wife, it was even harder coping with his absence. "Watching him pack, I hated it," Monica said. "The first few nights when he was at Fort Dix, I cried every night. I had been with the kids before when he had gone away, but this was different. This wasn't just two weeks, so the adjustment period was kind of hard."
Finishing his training in Fort Dix, Fred had a free weekend shortly before deploying to Kuwait and decided to pay his family a surprise visit. It was a weekend Monica will always remember. "We went to see 'Harry Potter,' we did a little shopping, and he spent some time with the kids," she said. McVey Elementary third-grader Danny, Fred's son from a previous relationship, started playing basketball this year and got to show his dad a tape of a recent game.
Still, in many ways, the weekend was bittersweet. While Fred's visit was certainly a welcome surprise, Monica knew his stay would be short. Thousands of miles across the Atlantic, a war with Iraq was looking increasingly inevitable, and Fred was heading straight for it.
"There are a lot of things he doesn't like to talk about, and I don't bring it up. I stay strong for him," Monica said. "I was upset when he left. We just kissed each other and said 'I love you so much.'"
Her sadness gave way to anxiety on Monday, March 17, the evening President George W. Bush issued an ultimatum to Saddam Hussein and his two sons to leave Iraq or be forced out. "He called me on Tuesday to tell me that he was going from the southern part of Kuwait to the north," Monica said. One day later, the coalition assault on Iraq began.
"I said, 'Oh my God, it's starting,'" she said. "It's just a scary thing, but the way I keep myself calm is [thinking] that he's in the transportation unit and he's in a safer position than some of the other soldiers."
It's been about four months since Monica last saw her husband, and she knows little of where he is or what he's now doing. She received a quick call from him early last Friday, so she knows he's OK. "I don't know how he's doing," she said. "I'd like to know what it's like to be sitting there, and all of a sudden it's, 'Put your gas mask on and run into the bunker.' He doesn't discuss it that much."
It could be anywhere from a year to 18 months before Fred returns home to his family. Monica hopes it will be much sooner. "There's also the hope in my mind that he can come home soon, hopefully for his birthday," which is in late May, she said.
Already in his short absence, he's missed much. Katrina, now 14 months old, has started to crawl and can almost walk on her own. Meanwhile, Danny just celebrated his ninth birthday. "I know he is in Kuwait," the well-spoken youngster said of his father. "I heard that the president of the country, George W. Bush, was on TV, and he told the president of Iraq to get out with his sons in 48 hours."
Danny hopes for his father's swift return as well. "I miss playing football with him," he said. "I miss when I used to sleep with him."
