By BERNADETTE GIACOMAZZO
At the interactive meeting, Marcus along with three of the troubled teens he profiled in the book encouraged an open and frank discussion among parents and teens..
I am most impressed with those in attendance, said Marcus, because they are the ones who are involved in their children-s lives. More often than not, it-s the parents who stick their heads in the sand those who pretend there is nothing wrong that end up saying, ÔI wish I-d come to something like this.- But it is our responsibility as parents to keep an eye on our kids, and their friends.
Marcus got the idea for his book after spending time at the Academy at Swift River, a private boarding school for troubled teens in the Berkshire Mountains of western Massachusetts. He hoped to understand how seemingly normal, otherwise privileged children fell into the pitfalls of drugs, sex and alcohol abuse.
What Marcus discovered in his research was that, regardless of social standing or economic background, all of the troubled teens had the common thread of a disconnect from their parents. All felt that they were unable, and even unwilling, to talk to their parents about the troubles they faced on a daily basis.
My whole behavior pattern was one big cry for help, said Ashley, a New York City native who grew up as a child of wealth and privilege and who, like the other two teens, used a pseudonym. She attended an all-girls school, and said she got into drugs because of peer pressure. My parents didn-t want to accept the fact that I was in trouble, she said. After being kicked out of several schools, including Swift River, Ashley got sober, and is currently attending college and studying writing.
For Tyrone, an African-American kid from Queens, his parents- divorce led him into a deep, spiraling depression. He was sent to Swift River to learn to deal with his depression, which would often lead him to isolate himself from the world around him. I realized I couldn-t keep doing what I was doing, Tyrone said of his Swift River experience.
Each of the school-s graduates had a similar message for the parents in attendance: When it comes to your children, be a parent first. You have all the time in the world after they grow up to be their friend, said New Jersey native D.J. But be a parent to them first and foremost until then.
After the presentation, village administrator Frank Quigley spoke briefly, but frankly, to all those in attendance. I consider myself a hardened law enforcement official, he said, and I have to say that what I heard tonight scared the pants off of me.
Quigley was referring to the part of the presentation when the South Side students were asked to write, anonymously, a secret about themselves that they wished they could tell their parents. What Quigley, and all in attendance, discovered was that middle school kids were experimenting with cocaine, alcohol and prescription drugs, engaging in sexual activity, and even running away from home. We, as village administrators, feel a great responsibility to protect our children, he said.
Quigley also announced that Rockville Centre was committed to enforcing the county- and villagewide Social Host Responsibility Law. Inspired by the City of Long Beach, which passed its own Social Host law two years ago (the first town in Nassau County to do so), Rockville Centre is currently increasing its efforts to curb underage drinking and parental irresponsibility.
Under the Nassau County Social Host Responsibility Law, which was in effect as of July 2007, any parent who knowingly allows children under age 21 to drink is subject to a misdemeanor charge and a prison term of up to one year. Though the village penalty is not as severe offenders face only monetary penalties there is the possibility of civil liability.
Quigley promised that the village would be diligent in enforcing the new laws. We are fully committed to enforcing these laws, he said. They are for your safety, and for the safety of our children.
Commments about this story? Bgiacomazzo@liherald.com or (516) 569-4000 ext. 240.
