Living life on the edge

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3. Do you initially under react, ignoring tasks until the pressure is on? Then, once the adrenaline rush kicks in, do you go into overdrive?
4. Do you believe that if you don't have a deadline, it makes no sense to do something early?
5. Do you get bored easily?
Mike answered yes to all of these questions. Mike, as you may have already guessed, is your prototypical crisis-maker procrastinator. When he was in college, he took pride in not studying all semester. Then, when the pressure was on, he would pull an all-nighter and actually do all right for himself, maintaining a 3.0 average. Mike defended his way of life, saying, "I like the challenge of doing things when the pressure is on. I could never be like my girl friend who is much better organized and more conscientious. She cares about her work. I admire that quality but I also think it's a big waste of time. She puts so much time into studying. I couldn't do it. I get distracted easily and if I'm bored with stuff, I fall asleep. She thinks I have a problem with time, but it's just my way. If I have 2 hours to get ready to go somewhere, I'll wait till the last possible moment to get started. I enjoy seeing how quickly I can get someplace. It's like a game. If I hit the lights in a certain way and get a parking spot right where I want to, I can get there in record time and congratulate myself for beating the odds!
"Let's fast forward 10 years, one marriage and two kids later. Mike is speaking in a very different tone of voice. His pride in living on the edge has turned into chronic frustration. "I can't seem to make myself do anything until I'm under heavy pressure to perform," he complained. "It's no longer working out for me so well. I used to think I could wait until the last minute, then rush in like some sort of super hero and get it all done. Now my way just seems exhausting. I've been reprimanded at work and there's a lot of tension between my wife and myself over this matter. Mike's crisis-making procrastination was finally catching up to him. He realized that in college, his pattern of living was no big deal. For one thing, college students are great at pulling all nighters. After all, the next few days they can sleep the day away anyway, so why not? Secondly, the only one really affected by his putting things off to the last minute was himself. If his results were less than stellar, it was his problem. But in adult life, people live and work in groups where they depend upon one another to get things done. When Mike didn't do his part at work, his work team was affected. If Mike didn't do his part at home, his family was stressed. To change his pattern of procrastination, Mike needed to increase his motivation to get things done, well before a crisis situation developed. At the same time, he had to decrease his emotional investment in last-minute, high stress performance. This was not easy to do. What helped Mike make the change was to realize that he was relying exclusively on stress as a motivator to get things accomplished. After some serious soul-searching, he recognized that he needed to develop other ways to become a self-starter. Here are the questions he began to ask himself that helped him initiate a change:

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Are there good reasons for me to do this task as efficiently and thoughtfully as I can?


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Is there a way I can make doing the task more fun, so that I can actually enjoy myself?


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Do I want to be part of "the team" instead of apart from "the team"?


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Can taking care of my responsibilities in a timely way benefit me financially or reputation wise?


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Can changing my pattern improve my relationships? Linda Sapadin, Ph.D. is a psychologist in private practice who works with individuals, families and couples. Copyright ©Ê2003