By Doug Miller
On a day that was overwhelmingly hot, compounded by a thick haze weighed heavier by the grief inside the overcrowded St. Ignatius Martyr church, Jennifer and Neil Flynn of Lido Beach buried their 7-year-old daughter Katie, who was killed by a wrong-way driver on the Meadowbrook Parkway over the July Fourth weekend. The driver of the limousine in which Katie was riding, 59-year-old Stanley Rabinowitz of Farmingdale, also died.
Nobody who was in attendance at St. Ignatius will ever forget any part of it - not the heat, not the haze, and especially not the grief. The Mass was celebrated by an old Long Beach favorite, the Rev. Charles Romano, who called the church his home for years and remains close to many parish families. Joining him was Deacon Tom Evrard, chaplain of the Long Beach Police Department, helping to bury the child of a family of civil servants. Also present was the regal figure of Bishop William Murphy, leader of the Diocese of Rockville Centre.
In his homily, "Father Chuck," as Romano is known, complimented the family for its choice of readings, which focused on love and everlasting life. "Death is inevitable," he reminded the crowd. "But love conquers all."
But it was Katie's father, Neil, who left the mourners in awe with his eulogy. It was simply unforgettable. Still wearing a back brace two weeks after the crash, and helped to the pulpit by friends and crutches, he described a precocious, generous girl who was both the life of the party and the only way he could have been softened up to the possibility of having more children.
His explanation of his daughter's nickname, "Smiling Katie Flynn," elicited chuckles from the audience. But his portrayal of her as a young girl who was comfortable with adults, protective of her siblings and "my best friend" was met first with sobs, and then a church rarity, a thunderous ovation.
Veronica Danca, Katie's principal at Long Beach Catholic Regional School, read from the Song of Solomon, a reading so full of love ("Set me as a seal on your heart ...") that, as Evrard pointed out, it is often chosen for weddings.
The second reading, from St. Paul's Letter to the Philippians, also carried a message of joy. Read by family friend Gail Schwarting, it began with the simple blessing from God: "I want you to be happy"
Acknowledging the diversity of Long Beach, Evrard's homily welcomed everyone of every religion, encouraging them to pray to "the God of your understanding" in "this house of prayer."
Evrard praised the Flynn and Tangney families for their strength, for the examples they have set. And he praised the community for its devotion. "From the moment we heard about this tragedy, the entire Long Beach community assumed the role of ministers," Evrard said. "Each one of us offered ourselves to this family, gifts of food, gifts of labor, gifts of time, of transportation. Gifts of presence. Gifts of prayer ... We prayed wherever we were, we prayed in corridors, prayed in elevators, we prayed for miracles of healing, and we prayed for all who suffered the consequences of this tragedy."
Romano continued the homily, recalling working with area teens in the early 1980s, when New York raised its drinking age to 21. "I remember how upset they all were, that they felt they had a right that was being denied them," Romano said. "All we could say was, if holding off drinking for three more years would save lives, innocent lives, then it would be worth it.
"Too many young people here in Long Beach, and elsewhere, drank, and things needed to change," Romano continued. "And some did. But not enough. Not enough to prevent what happened to Katie, to Stanley, to their families. As Katie's mother said so courageously, 'This was so much more than an accident.'"
Romano said he could offer no explanation, no defense and no reason why, in the scheme of the universe, a little girl had to die so horrifically. But he reminded the mourners that Katie and Stanley were now one with God's love. "The answers to our questions are buried in the mind of God, and we don't have access to that," he said. "Katie's death was tragic. There is no perhaps about it, and no accident. I may never believe that God could will this. But I am convinced that because of Jesus's victorious self-sacrifice on the Cross, that Katie's death, as senseless as it seems, does not fall outside of God's design."
The Missalette for the Mass bore a picture of a smiling Katie on its cover, a crayon drawing of Long Beach on the back and, inside, a message from the Flynn and Tangney families:
"Thank you for celebrating Katie's life with us. Your generosity and support throughout this ordeal have been truly overwhelming. Once again, Long Beach has proven to be the greatest place in the world in which to live, not because of the sand or salt air, but because of you, our neighbors.
"We simply ask one further favor. That when things seem dark, you take a moment to think of smiling Katie Flynn and allow her memory to help light your way. God bless you all."
Comments about this story? DMiller@liherald.com or (516) 569-4000 ext. 213.
