By Anthony Rifilato
On Jan. 2, tears were shed for April Arcuri, a 21-year-old Baldwin resident who was killed in a car accident last month.
As her casket passed, hundreds of people released the balloons, which drifted into the distance, coloring the sky above, illustrating the young woman's belief that life should be celebrated.
"We never wanted someone to sit and cry over us," said Arcuri's sister, Jeannene, 23. "She always wanted to have more of a party. You should be celebrating life, not mourning it."
Arcuri, a 2003 graduate of Baldwin High School and a New York University graduate, was killed on Dec. 29. She was driving a friend's pickup truck on Sunrise Highway in Southampton when the vehicle struck a tree west of the Peconic overpass at about 11:30 a.m. She was helping a friend transport a car to his parents' house on Shelter Island, where she planned to spend
the day.
The cause of the accident is still under investigation, but relatives said that a wheel on the red 1999 Ford Ranger might have come off. Arcuri was partially ejected from the truck, and died later at Stony Brook University Medical Center. The medical examiner, her sister said, said she was in perfect health.
Arcuri's death devastated family and friends, who admired her versatility and drive as well as her thirst for living. She did more in her short life than most do in a lifetime, her family said, something that motivated and inspired others. "She lived the life of a 50-year-old at 21," said Jeannene.
Arcuri was not only in a popular local rock band, Murr, but was an avid boater, surfer, clam digger and race car driver. She excelled academically at NYU, with a double major in history and psychology, as well as a minor in social studies education.
"I don't think there was anything she couldn't have done," said Cathleen Dee, a close friend. "She always pushed her friends to do better, and if she felt they weren't living up to their full potential, she'd push them."
Arcuri was born on April 13, 1985, and grew up in Baldwin. She attended Plaza Elementary School, and from an early age, relatives said, she exhibited a passion for learning and being hands-on. "You never knew what April was going to get into," her mother, Rosemary, said.
Her father, Andrew, died in 1991. Growing up, the Arcuri sisters spent a lot of time at their grandparents' marina, Saltair, in Freeport. "Our lives revolved around the marina," Jeannene recalled.
There Arcuri learned how to repair and winterize boats and to dig clams, among other activities. "The marina was more of a family affair than a business affair," said Monsignor Michael Hull, who presided over the funeral mass and has known the family for 30 years. Hull's family kept a boat in the marina, and he watched the girls grow up.
"April took a broad interest in her grandparents' boat yard," he said. "Most of us saw April grow up there. She was extraordinarily friendly. When people would start working on their boat, she was always willing to lend a hand."
At age 10, Arcuri built a sailboat with a friend, and when she was 14, she bought a 13-foot whaler and would go clam-digging around the South Shore. This past summer, she was looking to buy a 32-foot Luhrs boat, her sister said. "She had many dream boats, and that was one of them," Jeannene said.
April was known for being impetuous and impulsive, always ready to have fun. Being on the water, whether jet-skiing or clam-digging, was her escape, her mother said.
For Rosemary, that often meant hitting the water after finishing her job at a bank to be with her daughter. "How many times I went on the boat in my work clothes," Rosemary said. "We had such a good time. We'd stay on the water at night. I felt like I was 13 again."
An interest in race cars came later, and Arcuri was a savvy mechanic and driver. At one point in her teens she had four cars, one of which was a white Trans-Am. She could often be seen working on cars at the marina, her second home. In 2005 she bought a 1987 Camaro, which she restored and raced last spring in Englishtown, N.J.
While Arcuri had interests traditionally associated with guys, it made her no less of a woman, her sister said. "She was definitely a tomboy, but at the same time very womanly," Jeannene said.
As a student at Baldwin High, she excelled academically, ranking in the top 10 of her graduating class. She was named "most unique" student, and was praised by her teachers. "One of her most attractive qualities was her ability to speak quite directly about her emotions," said Mary Fallica, Arcuri's social studies teacher. "She was very affectionate and loving. We have very few children who feel socially confident, but she showed it. She was a fabulous student and a really smart kid."
Arcuri took such an interest in her sociology class, Fallica said, that she wanted to enroll in the class again in her senior year, even though she wouldn't earn credits. "She was an honorary guest," Fallica said. "On a free period she would come to class and join in the discussion, but she'd do it in a warm and humble way."
A rock star is born
Arcuri was a talented musician, equally at ease playing guitar, drums or piano. In high school she decided to form a rock band after attending a Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers concert. Along with her sister, the lead singer, and friends Christina Dimitropolous and Theresa Mueller, April formed Murr, named after a weird sound Mueller would make.
April was the group's drummer and main songwriter, and the group became a local favorite with its upbeat punk rock songs and engaging stage presence. They played a show at Baldwin High, won a local battle of the bands in 2003 and eventually performed on a number of radio shows and gigs around Long Island. "That was one of her favorite things, performing with her band, and she loved them all," said Dee, who met April at a Murr show. "She was so gifted musically."
Arcuri and her bandmates were enthusiastic and had a do-it-yourself spirit, especially when it came to promoting themselves. They created an eye-catching Web site, and April would distribute fliers all over the South Shore, Dee said. Once she knocked over a soda machine at a local restaurant trying to put up a Murr poster, which had the whole group laughing. "She was crazy in the most wonderful way," said Dee. "She would make you laugh with the most random things."
In 2004, the group hit a high point, performing at the legendary CBGB in Manhattan. For the girls, it was the realization of a dream, Jeannene said. "That and performing with Zebrahead was a dream come true," said Jeannene, referring to a rock band Murr joined on stage in 2004.
The members of Murr, huge fans of Zebrahead, had sent them a video of Zebrahead songs they had covered live. To their astonishment, Zebrahead members were impressed, and asked the girls to perform with them at a concert. "She said, 'We're doing it,'" Jeannene said of her sister's reaction. "April was the first one up on stage. She was completely flipping out."
A "unique" girl's responsibilities
But in 2005, other responsibilities began to take precedence over the band. Arcuri was busy with her studies and was planning to take graduate classes at NYU's Steinhardt School of Education. She took her education seriously, her mother said, and with a double major and a minor, it was a lot to juggle.
"I always felt that if I gave my kids an education, instead of money, they'd always have that," Rosemary said. "That's the way April was. She understood what I was saying."
And though she was set to begin student teaching in the city, April was observing a social studies class at Baldwin High last fall to fulfill an NYU class requirement, and was excited to be with her former teachers. She graduated from NYU last month, and since she was also considering a career in law, she took the LSATs in November. She scored above average, her mother said, though April believed she could do better.
"She ... was torn between education or law," said Jeannene. "But she finally made her decision, although she said she may take the test again after graduate school."
Though April loved being in a band, she wanted more out of life, Dee and others said. "She always said that the rock 'n' roll lifestyle was never for her, but she loved writing music and loved playing it," said Dee. "I think she wanted more for herself and her friends, but she loved to perform and do her thing up there."
Arcuri kept busy with a part-time job at Terranova Florist in Baldwin as well, where she worked with her sister for five years. And as grandparents, Vincent and Regina Greco of Freeport, were getting older, she made helping them at the marina a main priority.
Murr disbanded in 2005, though recently the Arcuri sisters considered regrouping with their former bandmates. When April was approached by a friend to form a new group, she refused, her sister said, and held out hope for a reunion. "She said it wouldn't be the same," Jeannene said.
Life without April
Arcuri's family and friends are eager to find out what caused the accident, and are awaiting an official explanation from the Southampton Police Department. "I need to find out what happened, and I need to know why," said Jeannene.
Always a fighter, April refused to go easily when she was taken to Southampton Hospital and later to Stony Brook, where she died. "They said it was amazing she lived as long as she did," Jeannene said. "She was alive at both hospitals. She wasn't going to give up."
The morning of the day she died, Arcuri got a phone call from the village of North Hempstead. She had studied to be a bay constable recently, and, needless to say, had easily passed the test. "They called to say she had an interview," Rosemary said. "She got 100 and had No. 1 eligibility. April was ecstatic."
Now, Jeannene said, it is even more important that she pursue the dreams she and her sister had, which included operating their own marina or a small business. It's what April would have wanted, Jeannene said. "April and I had dreams and ambitions," she said. "And now I am even more determined to fulfill them."
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