What's a parent to do?

      The number one problem for many parents is how to get their kids to do what they are
supposed to do.
      The number one "conversation" that parents have with their teens is asking if they took care of their responsibilities. "Did you do your homework?" "Did you clean your room?" "Did you take the garbage out?" "Did you put away your clothes?" I call these compliance requests.
      All of these compliance requests are jammed into the very sparse time that teens and parents spend together. Generally, it's no more than 15 minutes a day. And those 15 minutes are not interference-free. How many families talk with each other without constant competition from the TV, phone, computer or video games?
      And how do teens respond to their parents' compliance requests? By beefing, griping, kicking, squawking! "It's not fair," "I'll do it later," "Stop nagging me," "You just asked me that!"
      These responses leave parents mega-frustrated as they defend their right to oversee their kids' life. "I wouldn't have to ask you 100 times, if you did it the first time." "If you weren't always on the Internet, you'd have time to take care of your responsibilities!"
       So what's a parent to do?
      My number one suggestion is to take more time to talk with your kids about something other than, "Did you do...?"
      For many parents, this will not be a simple assignment. You may get so busy monitoring your kids' responsibilities, that you don't know what else to "chat" about.
      Here are some ideas: