By: Linda Sapadin
Most people don't think much about philosophy, until they are in an "existential crisis," that is, a crisis that precipitates thinking about one's existence. Typically, these times occur during adolescence, mid-life, old age or with the onset of depression, anxiety or death of a loved one. Now ask yourself: Do I need to wait until a crisis occurs before I think about who I am or what my life is about? Wouldn't it be a better idea if you thought about philosophical issues from time to time, such things as: how you live your life; what you are doing on this planet; how you spend your time; what you value; what you are interested in; and what you take for granted?Let's take a look at what can happen when you look at yourself in a fresh light. Carl, a 35-year-old successful trader, was feeling that something wasn't right in his life, despite having a good career and being in a caring relationship. When I asked Carl to tell me something about "who he is," he responded, "I'm a keen-edged businessman with the heart of a nun." Interesting choice of words, I thought. As I got to know Carl better, I asked him to tell me more about his creative side. He looked at me quizzically. "Not me," he said. "My sister was the artist; I was the math whiz."Though not an artist in the paint a picture manner, it was clear to me that Carl's use of words, metaphors, dreams, feelings and color reflected a creativity that Carl was unaware of. As he became more open to viewing himself as a creative person, he started to write poetry. This reminded him of the lyrics he used to write when he played guitar in college.Does he have hopes of becoming a published poet? Though it's crossed his mind every now and then, he knows this is not where he is headed. His poetry, however, has served another purpose. Last week, after a disillusioning betrayal of a friend, he turned to pen and ink. Six months ago, he said, "What happened would have preyed on my mind for days. This time, though, I wrote a three-page poem about the bankruptcy of a soul. I ended my poem with:
"What do I do when my trust is shattered?My friend burst my bubble.I'm certain of no one. Yet, more than ever, I need to maintain faith in everyone."Writing this poem permitted him to acknowledge his hurt and let his disappointment go. When I told him that he sounded like a poet-philosopher, his eyes widened. "I never took a course in philosophy. It wasn't encouraged in business school. Perhaps that will be my next challenge."Who needs philosophy? You do. To know yourself better. To observe the world more deeply. To understand the people you live with. To comprehend the world you live in. To appreciate what you take for granted. And to give new meaning and relevance to your everyday living.
Linda Sapadin, Ph.D. is a psychologist in private practice who works with individuals, couples and families. © Copyright 2003.
