You think about the idea for awhile, but before long your motivation evaporates and you do nothing. After all, who are you to write your life story? Youíre not famous. Youíre no genius. Maybe you convince yourself that thereís nothing that was so interesting in your life. Or perhaps you think the opposite ó so much has happened that itís all so confusing. Where would you even begin?
I'd like to encourage you to tell your story. First, Iíll tell you why. Then Iíll share with you how.
First: Why bother?
Do it for yourself. Looking back on your life with a reflective mind will be a creative journey for you, helping you appreciate all youíve been through.
Do it to connect to others. Think of what it would mean to you if those who came before you had written meaningful material about their lives. Wouldnít you really want to know something about them other than the basic facts (what country they came from, who they married, when they died?)
Do it to appreciate your past. So much has changed since you grew up and you needed to adapt. How did you do it? What was hard for you? What was easy for you? What do you like about the way things are now? What do you miss about the way things used to be?
Do it for your kids and grandkids, even if they are totally absorbed in their own lives and donít want to know anything about you, (except what you can do for them). Have faith. One day they will outgrow their narcissism and will appreciate the stories you write.
Do it as a gift for a special occasion. Surprise family and friends by writing a story about how significant they have been in your life.
Do it to make your photographs come to life. Think of how much more meaningful those family photos will be when you flesh them out with an interesting story about what you were feeling at those moments.
But how would I even begin to write?
Donít intimidate yourself by thinking that you have to tell it all. If you want to keep some things secret (and who does not have secrets to keep?), thatís fine.
Donít intimidate yourself by thinking that you have to write a memoir about your whole life. Thatís too much! Choose the stories that are most interesting to you and begin.
Do start writing, donít just keep thinking about it.
Do write, donít edit. Editing can be done later.
Do start by picking a small topic, such as: "A turning point in my life," "The best decision I ever made," or "My biggest surprise."
Do sign up for my seminar at Hewlett-Woodmere Continuing Education, called "Everyone Has a Story to Tell" on Thursday, Oct. 19, from 10:30 a.m. to 12:30 p.m. Participants will learn ways to: write using your head and your heart, give form and focus to your ideas, tap your creativity and quiet your inner critic. Advance registration is required. Call (516) 374-8163. I hope to see you there.
Copyright 2006
Linda Sapadin, Ph.D. is a psychologist in private practice who specializes in helping people build competence, enrich relationships and overcome self-defeating patterns of behavior.
Additional courses she will be teaching at Hewlett-Woodmere Adult Ed. are: What Makes Intimate Relationships Thrive: Thursday, Oct. 26, 7-9 p.m.; Unlocking the Secrets of Your Dreams: Thursday, Nov. 2, 10:30-12:30. Call 374-8163 for more information or e-mail DrSapadin@aol.com.
